Friday, February 28, 2014

THE BLAME GAME: WHO DO YOU BLAME?

 


Empowerment Commentary By Jarrett L. Perdue Sr.

The definition of blame is:
  • To hold responsible. To find fault with. The state of being responsible for a fault or error; to consider (someone) responsible for: an expression of condemnation:
  • The act of informing an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible.
  • The state of having caused a bad event
There are different types of blame. Self blame, victim blame, moral blame, natural disaster blame.

It is easy to blame someone or something else for our situations in life. Many people will make the declaration that they are not able to progress in life because of other people and circumstances. Putting the blame on others can be justified. For example, people that are victims of physical and verbal abuse due to the cause of others is reason for justification. Even though we are justified, we do not want to stay in that state of mind by carrying behavioral and categorical self blame which may lead to guilt, even if we are the victims. The word blame also means to harass with constant criticism and attribute responsibility to.



We do have the ability to overcome, become assertive, and give ourselves the ability to manage our success in daily living.

In this commentary on
Empowerment & The Blame Game, I will deal with 6 areas of blame I believe are very important and the process for overcoming The Blame Game and having a triumphant and successful way of thinking.


The 6 areas are: 
 (1) God.
 (2) Society.
 (3) Church Organizations.
 (4) Friends.
 (5) Family.
 (6) Education.
 


COMMENTARY:

 







(1) BLAME IT ON GOD




We can start with people blaming bad things that happen on GOD.
Lighting, earthquakes, natural disasters. Did you know that these are defined as an
"ACT OF GOD"? Did you also know that the term "ACT OF GOD" is a legal term. It is defined as "A direct, sudden, and irresistible action of natural forces such as could not reasonably have been foreseen or prevented, as a flood, hurricane, earthquake, or other natural catastrophe."




It is amazing how no one wants to credit God for the great and wonderful events that happen in the earth and in their lives. How many times do you hear, if at all, people giving credit to God for the beautiful trees and skies we have? This, among so many other things in the creation process.

 
As soon as tragedy strikes, here comes The Blame Game where it is all God’s fault. There is no acknowledgement of God when things are going wonderful in nature and our loved ones are protected daily. 
When catastrophic events occur, or nothing positive is reported in the news, then according to some, God is at fault.

Instead of analyzing each circumstance to get an understanding of why something occurred, it is easy to unload all the blame on
God. Many people have been indoctrinated to believe that God is the cause of bad things that happen in everyday life.

The Manuscript recording from what is known as the Bible written around 90 a.d. states in John 10:10
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."
The Amplified Bible states: “
The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).” In this context of the KJV translation, thief is from the Greek word, kleptēs (kle'p-tās) meaning an embezzler, wrongdoer, offender, criminal, outlaw. This is what the thief does: Steal (commit a theft), kill (to slay and slaughter), and destroy (to put out of the way entirely. render useless).



Compare this to the writings in 1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:”
Devour in Greek is katapinō (
kä-tä-pē'-nō) - to swallow up, destroy.

  • The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy.
  • The adversary comes to swallow up and destroy.
None of these things can be applied to God. They are only applied to an antagonist.

The second part of
John 10:10 states that we might have life and have it more abundantly.

  • Life in the Greek understanding is zōē (zō-ā) – the state of one who is possessed of vitality or is animate. Of the absolute fulness of life, both essential and ethical, which belongs to God. Life real and genuine, a life active and vigorous, devoted to God, blessed, in the portion even in this world of those who put their trust in Christ.”
  • Abundantly is perissos (pe-rēs-so's) - over and above. Superadded. Superior, extraordinary, surpassing.
It is a total contradiction, not confirmation, of who God is when we blame God for things that are not attributed to God. 
If anyone is going to point and connect God to things, then they should take self-responsibility and know and understand why they make the connection.


(2) BLAME IT ON SOCIETY

Then there is The Blame Game on SOCIETY. We read the paper, watch the news, listen to the radio, search the Internet, and these things become our social relations and social interaction.

We allow ourselves to become a receiver of the downbeat things we hear, instead of extracting the positive things in those areas and applying them in our lives.

Many individuals who play
The Blame Game on Society do not take the time to look for helpful things, but continue to feed their minds with negativity day after day where it becomes chronic, and then blame the media for not putting on anything positive.


Here is the solution; Stop allowing yourself to become a casualty and a target. If you continue to hear the negative, you will continue to be in the antithetical arena of extracting productive, effective and sound information.
Whatever you hear from Society that is not in accordance with a progressive and healthy lifestyle, then you delete it and have an intellective mindset. Do not play The Blame Game by blaming things on Society. Proactively be energetic and dedicated by continuing to move into the area of elevation and improvement.



(3) BLAME IT ON THE CHURCH

The Blame Game given to CHURCH ORGANIZATIONS is an interesting subject.

Choosing and becoming a member of a
Church ministry is all about personal choices. People have the ability to choose to praise, worship and be educated in the best way to benefit them personally, not the way someone else states how you should interact and where you should or should not go.

The
Church is not the building. The building is the gathering place where many go to fellowship with each other. The word Church not only means called out” but literally means, dedicated to the Lord,” not to a building. People go to what is defined as a Church building and are never dedicated to the Lord. Dedicated to the Lord means you are devoted, enthusiastic, steadfast, loyal, committed, faithful, and firm to a daily lifestyle that is in relationship with scriptural principles. Notice, it is a daily lifestyle, not just on the Sabbath, where an act can be put on because there are other people involved. It is a wonderful process to meet and fellowship with others at designated times. We must remember what our purpose is for assembling ourselves together.

Here is where
The Blame Game comes in concerning the Church. When things are not going the way someone feels it should be going in their lives, they blame the Church. By that, I mean, many people feel the Church is responsible for their success and gain in life.


The interesting thing is people will complain about the Church and leadership and how they are not being fed spiritually, but yet they stay at that Church for years and years. If a person believed they were not being fed the Word Of God, why continue to stay and complain for years, talk about everyone and everything in the Church, spread negative information to those outside of the establishment, talk about how the Church and leadership has been unfair to them, then blame leadership for their defeated lifestyle and all their problems.

Also, in fairness to the teaching of the specific ministry that the charge is being made against, one can only substantiate the charge if they have completed a well thought-out examination in that specific area of teaching. Then, they would have to establish where the teaching is in contradiction with the scriptures. If they are unable to do that, then they really cannot say they are not being taught properly. It then may be something personal against the leadership.

Here is my response in the form of 2 questions to those that state their pastor did not teach them the Word of
God.
(1)
How many notes did you take all the years you attended the church?” (2)“If you took notes, how much research of the scriptures did you do to see if what the leadership of the church is teaching is accurate?”

The general answer is they never took notes and never did any type of research or analysis.


In many cases it is a valid concern that people are not being fed with scriptural understanding. If that is the case, then
self-responsibility tells you to find a place that you will be fed the substance of the Word. During that interim time, it is up to the person to search and study God’s Word for himself or herself. (See the link on "EMPOWERMENT & BIBLE STUDY" http://perduespositiveempowermentstudy.blogspot.com/ ).

It is essential to continue to have daily dialogue with your Heavenly Father, and request to find a ministry that will give you scriptural progression to actuate in daily living. Then, no one has to play
The Blame Game and will be able to live a spiritual and healthy lifestyle. There are many great and wonderful ministries that do teach the proper method of God’s Word. Those ministries are the ones that should be concentrated on.





(4) BLAME IT ON FRIENDS
The next area is The Blame Game on FRIENDS.

The definition of a friend is:
"A person who is on good terms with another." "A person who gives assistance."

Many people have been wronged, betrayed, falsified against, and talked about by others. This is nothing new to anyone. Many times people blame people who they thought were
Friends who have said and done harmful things to them as the reason for them feeling and acting the way they do.

When you are wronged, betrayed and falsified against, you are justified in feeling emotional hurt, anger and bitterness, especially if the perpetrator(s) is someone close to you and that you trusted.

After these things have been brought to your attention, and your frame of mind about your
friend has changed, you have the choice of internalizing that hurt and blame the ones you put your trust in, who have now wronged you by their verbal assault and actions, for every subsequent negative situation that happens in your life, or you can move on. Of course the emotional pain will still be there, but you must apply self-responsibility with empowerment and start the healing process for yourself. If part of the healing process is talking to the person(s), even if there is no longer trust, then that is what should be done. Have dialogue and express your feelings. You may find a greater understanding of what happened to the friendship. It is an individual choice. Make sure your temperament is right, and there is no animosity or resentment in your disposition.





(5) BLAME IT ON FAMILY



Another area for The Blame Game is FAMILY. Many people will blame Family for the condition they are in or the emotional strife they are going through. At times Family can be the cause of very hurtful situations and people will maintain that hurt in their heart for years and years.

People will blame
Generation Curses” on their Family as the reason for them not being able to succeed. Even though you may be related by blood, you are still an individual. Even though your Family may have done things that have not been profitable, you are still an individual. This means that you have to be in charge of your own life, especially when you become an adult.

Giving or allowing your
Family control over your mind and life and the things you do is relinquishing power to someone else. So if Family takes advantage of the situation and you allow it, you cannot continually put the blame on them. The key here is, if you allow it!
You do not have to be who your
Family wants you to be. If you decide to change for Family, you will find they will not change for you. It is nothing wrong if Family wants to give positive input and suggestions as long as they are not speaking to you in the area of superiority. Remember, just because concepts comes from a Family member, does not mean it will have positive application in your life.

Let us love and respect our
Family. We can exchange ideas. Do not continue to blame them for things in your own personal lives. They may be guilty and you feel justified in stating that it is their fault you are in the situation you are in. Take things and turn them into a positive for daily living.


(6) BLAME IT ON EDUCATION



In the MSN ENCARTA Dictionary, Education is defined as "The imparting and acquiring of knowledge through teaching and learning, especially at a school or similar institution."

Under
Education one can gain knowledge, instruction, learning experience, and study of teaching.

Sometimes people blame their lack of success and situations they are in because they do not have the proper
EDUCATION for the particular field they want to go in. Many people equate degrees with Education. I am in 100% agreement with anyone who chooses to go to school for Education to receive his or her degree in a given field. With that said, there are those who choose to gain Education in other areas in life without going to college. All of us have different concepts and goals. Education is about gaining knowledge. Depending on what one wants to do will depend on the type of knowledge they need for their profession.

We cannot blame our lack of
Education on Education itself. It is up to the individual person to search and find out about the field they want to go in and be motivated to carry out their desire and see what it takes to have success in that specific discipline. A college degree may be required, a license may be required, a certificate may be required, and experience may be required. Whatever you need to do to get the Education you need, take self-responsibility and carry it out.


These are 6 of the many areas people will attribute The Blame Game to.

I will conclude this segment of
Empowerment with this; The Blame Game is something we should not involve ourselves in on a continuing basis even if we feel justified. We all have been given special gifts, talents and abilities, to be totally successful in our endeavors in life. Let us all take advantage of the fringe benefits placed in each and every one of us and live a daily life of gain, achievement, and advancement. Jarrett L. Perdue Sr.